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Who missed us most?

by Vicki Jeffels on September 14, 2012

I think they missed me, but I’m not sure who missed me most – the kids or the pets.

Porto

Porto sparkles at night. Great city for grown-ups.

The first hint came by telephone in a call to Dark Princess, to let her know that I’d arrived at Gatwick but we wouldn’t be getting home until much later as it was rush hour traffic.

And I needed coffee and a cogitate.

Travel by airplane is so quick these days that it’s almost like time lapse photography. Each frame of the past week in Porto and the Douro Valley morphs into a surreal reel of images that dissolves into one lasting impression.

Our wonderful week in Porto and up in the magnificent Douro Valley felt so grown-up relaxed that I wasn’t certain I was ready to come home. Landing at Gatwick after a short 1hr 40minute flight, I had felt a little like a time traveller. I often wonder if travelling quickly is dislocating, for that very reason. That’s why I enjoy long-haul travel (yes I know I’m odd!) because it gives you time to process the last destination before you get to the next one. That, and there’s usually a glass of free wine!

Dark Princess seemed very pleased to hear from me, but not so pleased that we wouldn’t be home for another couple of hours.

“Are you still in Portugal?” she asked tearfully. I explained that my Englishman needed a feed and I needed a coffee before we drove the two hours home in rush hour traffic. I could tell she was disappointed and I was pretty sure that it wasn’t because they needed more time to clean the house. Properly! 

The next hint that we’d been missed came on the way home in the form of a missed call on my phone. Then a brief message from Son on voicemail. Apparently we had run out of potatoes, and milk, and bread, and cat food and dog food.

“Just saying”, he said.

As in, just saying in the hope you’ll stop and go to the supermarket and then come home and FEED ME.

I got the message, but I didn’t go to the supermarket.

We were pulling into our town when Miss Fliss rang and advised on the critical lack of potatoes. I suggested pasta, rice, orzo and when those suggestions didn’t improve the mood I confessed we were just pulling into town.

A few moments later the two cats and two out of three kids came running out to meet our car. The cats were meowing, the kids were yelling, the dog bowled My Englishman over.

And I was completely briefed on the potato famine crisis. (I think the kids were dragging out their Irish roots a tad too much!)

My first impression of the state of the house came from the smell that wafted out the front door. It was a mixture of teenage hormones, socks and stale washing that was growing a new form of antibiotic in the dryer. I hold high hopes for that chemical innovation as the kids have informed me that they’ve completely run out of money and yes, we had no bananas potatoes.

It was noisy and frantic with everyone trying to get in their piece about new timetables at college and school, and how they spent their allowance on apple pies from the supermarket. In the midst of this chaos their father rang from New Zealand, and Dark Princess asked him to call another time.

We were all flabbergasted. She never does that! Miss Fliss asked her why, and that’s when I got the answer to my question: who had missed us the most? When Dark Princess said she’d missed – not only me – but her stepfather as well, so wanted to spend the evening with us instead of on the phone, I knew.

So today is a mix of emotions. I’m pleased to be back but sad to leave Porto. I’m pleased to see the kids but feel saddened that they missed us. But most of all I feel guilty that we had such a good time, when they were missing us. And though I did succumb to the sad looks on wan little faces, and popped out and got emergency cat food and milk, I haven’t yet replenished the potato cupboard.

Do you ever stop feeling guilty about travelling without your kids?

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  • uniquenique01

    So glad you had a good time and don’t feel too guilty that the kids missed you sometimes a little time without the ones we love make us appreciate them more and more inclined to overlook the fact that they managed to eat all the potatoes ;~D….. welcome back

    • vegemitevix

      Thanks. Yes the trip was amazing! I cannot wait to share with you all the photos we took and the stories the local people shared with us. One of those life-changing trips for me and for my Englishman! I was even interviewed on local TV, though have no idea if they could understand my Kiwi accent.

  • http://www.facebook.com/christine.agateamorim Christine Agate-Amorim

    Lovely post, having young children I have never had the experience of being away from them for an extended period. Dont feel bad that they missed you, its nice in a good way, at least it shows they care and appreciate you and their stepfather! Glad you had a good time, Porto is a lovely place to visit!

    • vegemitevix

      It is nice in a way. Teens are tricky at the best of times because they seem so bullet proof and so determined to push their parents away! It was lovely hearing them say they missed us. And Porto…? OMG that is an amazing place. Everyone should go and visit! Just beautiful, relaxed, friendly and interesting, and a photographer’s dream.

  • expatmum

    Oh they’ll get over it!
    When the Little Guy and I took the Queenager back to college a few weeks ago, we were away for five days leaving the Ball & Chain and Man-Child in the house. The smell when we opened the door on our return was unbelievable. Still haven’t quite figured out what it was but I wasn’t impressed I can tell you.

    • vegemitevix

      The smell was weird, but what was even weirder was their solemn assurance that they had cleaned and tidied and yet my coffee mug from a week ago still seemed to be in the dishwasher – unwashed.

  • http://bloggertropolis.blogspot.com/ Steve

    I think it’s marvellous. Imagine how much worse it would be if you arrived home and they didn’t even notice.

    • vegemitevix

      Yeah, it was nice. My Englishman reckons it was good for them to a bit more independent. It was funny though when we told Son we’d just bought an oven and were going to pick it up this weekend, and he replied ‘oh thank God no more fried food!’ Hahahaha!

  • http://www.catchingthemagic.com/ Sarah

    “My first impression of the state of the house came from the smell that wafted out the front door. It was a mixture of teenage hormones, socks and stale washing that was growing a new form of antibiotic in the dryer.” – SO FUNNY!

    Oh darling, what a wonderful trip – and what a welcome home (potatoes and all!). I’m glad you were both missed and hope the appreciation of you and your Englishman’s wonderful presence continues for a long time xxx !

    • http://twitter.com/vegemitevix Vegemitevix

      Thanks Sarah, it was sweet. Though the smell was not. Not even a little bit!

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