April 2010

Bollocks!

30 April 2010

Some things a mother should never say to their fifteen year old son. enough balls?

Bad language, naughty stories about dating and adventures with the opposite sex, anything about his ahem, pride and jewels.

I was making dinner in our little kitchen last year. Hassled and ever so slightly stressed I stirred the spaghetti sauce and carefully turned the meatballs over to cook in the sauce.

My 19 year old Australian nephew came into the kitchen to chat, about this and that. He and his girlfriend were living on our floor at the time, so the little three bedroomed terrace was filled to the brim with seven mainly grown people.  Read more... (407 words, 1 image, estimated 1:38 mins reading time)

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Friday Funny Haha Embarassment

30 April 2010

vegemitevix Friday Funny HahaThank God It’s Friday! Don’t know about you but it’s been a very busy week for me and I’m thrilled to bits that it’s Friday and a Bank Holiday to boot! Yay! So here’s the drill..

There’s simply not enough funny stuff in the world so we decided to link up funny posts from the blogosphere for everyone to read. Let’s share the good stuff! Grab a Friday Funny Haha badge and pop your link into the McLinky thingy down there and let’s go! Don’t forget to leave me a message in the comments to let me know that you’ve linked and have a read of at least a couple of the others in the linky list.  Read more... (201 words, 2 images, estimated 48 secs reading time)

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Toilet Humour

29 April 2010

With the cool clear voice of Evanescence ringing through my head I flop out of bed and gingerly tie the robe.Toilet humour

Must go for a run! MUST. GO. FOR. A. RUN.

But first might treat myself to open eyes.

That done. I grab the sports bra. It’s one of those heavy duty ones. I dislocate my arms and slip into the straitjacket. We’re talking UPLIFT here Mama!

Heading out of the bedroom, seeing my hair up in a ponytail and my running gear on, dog goes berserk.  Read more... (704 words, 2 images, estimated 2:49 mins reading time)

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Feeding the RSS Monster

29 April 2010

Feeding the RSS Monster is like feeding Audrey in The Little Shock of Horrors, it never seems to end!

feeding rss monster

1986 Cinema version Little Shop of Horrors

As those of you who have been following this blog may well be aware I’ve had a few problems with broken feeds, duplicate feeds, feeds that disappeared and fetching errors …(not nice-looking errors, just couldn’t fetch the feed errors!)

My problems all began when I moved this blog from the old URL. Things didn’t go according to plan and along the way I’ve managed to learn a few things about what you need to do to make sure your RSS feed is well-fed.  Read more... (957 words, 4 images, estimated 3:50 mins reading time)

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but are you really worth it?

28 April 2010

I’ve been worshipping the shower god for ten minutes now.shower cannot rinse away the tiredness

I cannot rinse away the tiredness.

Soap bubbles, and steam roll down my skin, roll down the plug-hole, but my tiredness is a semi-permeable membrane, a second skin that lets vulnerability in.

I must not waste water.

I sit at the computer now and wince.

I must send that email.

My only client has asked me to estimate a job for her. I have done so, but I cannot bring myself to send her the quote. I know it is a lot of money for her and her fledgling business. Am I worth it?  Read more... (413 words, 1 image, estimated 1:39 mins reading time)

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Animal madness

28 April 2010

vegemitevix animal madness

Bailey – 40kgs of cute

vegemitevix animal madness

Stella – ever the star

“You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets” Nora Ephron

vegemitevix photos for The GalleryTara Cain’s challenge for The Gallery this week was to photograph a portrait, or two! These two fur babies are such important members of our family. If My Englishman had known I had them would he still have been keen for me to join him? Not only did he get an instant family, but pets as well!  I think he loves them as much as I do.

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Thank you for being a friend

27 April 2010

A box full of wonderful things appeared on my doorstep today.

It was full of promises….

A mysterious box from a friend

Dreams…………

Dreams - the success principles

and even a fantasy or two!

fantasies!

How to make a girl smile!

It was just brilliant.

Despite being held up by volcanic ash, my pressie from Susie at newdaynewlesson reminded me that you often make friends when you least expect it.Thank you Susie. Sorry about the photography, I was trembling with excitement.

Last year when I started blogging, I was feeling incredibly isolated. I’d moved across the world, and couldn’t seem to befriend anyone. Perhaps it was the ‘SOD OFF’ look printed on my forehead in indelible marker?  Read more... (389 words, 3 images, estimated 1:33 mins reading time)

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Rock the Casbah Garden Centre

27 April 2010

‘She was saying that she’d simply grown out of going out to parties and getting wasted and doing drugs every weekend…’

middle youth paradise

Garden centre - rock on!

My husband was nodding in benign disinterest.

Son, aged 16 yrs (next week!) lifted his head and fixed me with a look of incredulity.

‘You mean they were drinking and doing drugs at the party the other night? But they’re really old..like, like 35 and more, really old……’

Really Old. At 35!

See this is the problem with having your children at a young age!  Read more... (594 words, 1 image, estimated 2:23 mins reading time)

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Never Smile At A Crocodile

26 April 2010

My friend Susie over at Newdaynewlesson has had a brain wave, and has started The Kindness Club. Each week she is encouraging us to carry out an act of random kindness.

Last week it was to smile at a stranger.

I don’t have problems smiling with strangers, I usually do. That’s why I have so many ‘smile lines’ around my eyes y’know! Since I’ve been in Britain I’ve been a little taken aback at how few people smile back. If you stop to talk to them, they tend to respond either by blanking you or by giving you a ‘What the ‘f&&& do you want?’ look.  Read more... (578 words, 1 image, estimated 2:19 mins reading time)

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For Crying Out Loud!

26 April 2010

I’m wincing in my little terrace.

My lovely Italian neighbour is having a bad day. Quite possibly a bad week, or year…actually judging from the intensity of the yelling (in Italian) through the walls, I’m wondering if her whole life has been bad.

I’m wincing because I feel sorry for her. Do I put music on to drown it out? To give her some privacy?

I was thinking that I didn’t have these issues in New Zealand as I lived in a large detached home. Then I remembered actually that’s a great big porky!  Read more... (690 words, 1 image, estimated 2:46 mins reading time)

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