Friday Funny!

by vix on March 12, 2010

Flying Brazilian

‘You don’t mind if Angela does your wax today, do you? She’s new.’

There are three times you don’t want a ‘new practitioner’ – childbirth, hairdresser, and beauty therapist.

‘No problem’ I sighed.

I lay down on the bed and started to prepare for the full length leg wax, the Brazilian and eyebrow shaping. The usual deforestation.

Two hours later I was still there.

Now I hasten I do not have forestation of South American jungle proportions. There are no swing bridges, wilderness paths or rope swings, down there.

The girl was nervous so to relax her I started telling her some jokes. Making light of the situation.

‘Then there was the one about the emergency braz,’ I chatted… ‘ and that time I was sooo tired I fell asleep on the bed in the middle of it…’

As she relaxed she sped up. Getting into full swing.

‘Can you just put your hand there please?’

‘There?’

‘Yes, thanks’

Layer wax with spatula, pat down strip. Check to see I’ve taken a deep breath and…..

Strip back…..

With such gusto, the entire cloth strip laden with pubes flew out the open window behind us, and fell down onto the high street laden with shoppers, below.

‘And that’s how you do the Flying Brazilian…’ I said.

SPA WITH TOWELS
© Blotty | Dreamstime.com

  • MrsW

    NO! OMG! So long as you didn't get the uerge to go chasing it like a fiver in the wind… it's so hard to curb that urge. I have been known to flail after receipts..

  • JulieB

    Oh my goodness, you really do know how to tell them! I really must stop reading blog posts when I am drinking – yours is the second one in a few days that have caused me to practically snort tea all over the keyboard!

  • Pingback: uberVU - social comments

  • vegemitevix

    I will forever wonder where it landed. In an elderly woman's shopping bag? A young guys' hamburger?

  • vegemitevix

    Oh dear don't want to do that!!! I once ruined a laptop spilling red wine all over mine…and coffee (on a different night and different laptop)

  • funky_angie

    OMG that is too funny!

    Its prob for the best that you didnt find it – or that it wasn't returned via the open window ewwww

  • themadhouse

    PMSL. I have never ever had a wax in the lady forrest area

  • http://www.mumsgoneto.blogspot.com/ Trish @ Mum's Gone to

    The Mad house – neither have I!! I must have some deep-rooted fear though I think it's more the embarrassment factor of some young girl faffing about with my bits!
    And thanks to this post I will stick to my usual methods!

  • veryboredincatalunya

    LMAO, I would so have wanted to know what happened to it. Can you imagine the horror if you were just passing by and and a waxy/puby strip of cloth smacked you in the face. x

  • http://www.sleepisfortheweak.org.uk/ Josie

    I'm going to bottle this post and apply it twice a day when I'm feeling blue.

    Brilliant.

  • http://www.metropolitanmum.co.uk Metropolitan Mum

    Hahahahahaha. Where is that place? I want to go, too? Mine are never that funny.

  • muddlingalongmummy

    That's fantastic! :-)

  • naomidelatorre

    OMG!!! LMAO!! Did I tell you about the time that I was getting a wax in Chile only to discover several minutes into it that they were REUSING the wax?! It had other peoples pubes in it. For reals.

  • Nickie at Typecast

    I would have been MORTIFIED!!! :-D

  • http://www.momentsofwhimsy.com/ Cate

    I would have slunk out of that shop onto the street wearing dark glasses and a hat over my eyes!

    You are a very brave lady hehe

    • Anonymous

      Funny thing Cate, it was in Auckland and when I’m over I’ll tell you where. Very posh part of town too. lol.

  • http://newdaynewlesson.wordpress.com/ Susie @ Newdaynewlesson

    LMAO!!! Can't stop giggling. Glad it wasn't me it landed on!

    • Anonymous

      Oh me too. It’s like the blue gel stuff coming out of the airplane toilet isn’t it. One of those strange things that fall from heaven.

  • Pingback: You made me spit my drink out!

  • funky_angie

    eww pure minging

  • Chris

    OMG! I too have splurted liquid as a result of this post! Hilarious!

    • Anonymous

      Hope it wasn’t spurted out onto the keyboard, and hope that you take your liquids without milk and sugar. That’s the tricky bit getting that out from under the keys!

  • beckylj

    thanks for the laugh! hope it wasn't too painful an experience?

    • Anonymous

      I don’t seem to mind the pain. I have even fallen asleep in the middle of..

  • http://www.mommyologist.com The Mommyologist

    Hysterical!!! I am still not brave enough to get waxed down there. I'm sticking with the razor for now!

  • TamingInsanity

    At least you're quick with a joke…did you get a discount?

    • Anonymous

      No discount, but I did get fame. Or was it infamy?

  • http://www.perfectwelcome.blogspot.com Miss Welcome

    I laughed out loud. That was so funny, not just the event, but the description. Bravo!

  • http://www.perfectwelcome.blogspot.com Miss Welcome

    I laughed out loud. That was so funny, not just the event, but the description. Bravo!

  • Shopaholicann

    Soooo funny!

    • Anonymous

      Glad you enjoyed! Just think the next time you are in this position you’ll have something to laugh about!

  • http://funnyquotesandjokes.blogspot.com funny jokes shane

    hahaha LOL so great

  • http://www.competition-uk.co.uk Tom

    Brilliant! lmao

    I know a really funny comedian who’s always in and out of hospital with concussion, I live rather close to him, infact his just a stones throw away!

    Are you the author of a Joke? if so enter it at competition-uk.co.uk funniest Joke competition and you could win a big cash prize, entry is the price of a pack of gum.

    They also hold other competitions, they currently have a poetry competition and I hear that next month there will be a “best mans speech competition”. A very user friendly and easy to navigate website, its well worth a look!

    • http://www.vegemitevix.com vix

      thanks, not sure whether you think I’m funny, (ha ha not peculiar) or whether you’re spam..but either way…ok then.

Previous post:

Next post: